The Silent "I"

Movie Review: The Fifth Estate

My husband and I went to see The Fifth Estate on our weekly date night this week (Alternate Title: Julian Assange is a Big Weirdo). We had to choose between that and watching the Red Sox play the Cardinals in the World Series, two teams we like watching about as much as we enjoyed the his 'n hers colonoscopies we got when we turned 50.  We both like Benedict Cumberbatch, so we thought, how bad could it be?  and visited our local multiplex. We live on the edge, I know.

The Fifth Estate tells the story of Julian Assange, the founder of WikiLeaks, a website that allows whistleblowers/pissed-off employees to post confidential or even classified documents on the site anonymously.  The idea is that if the information is out there, without any kind of editing or explanation, corruption can be exposed to the light of day.  WikiLeaks didn't edit or filter the documents, just published them for the world to judge.  The film poses such heady questions as: Is it morally responsible or ethically to post information that could potentially expose individuals who assist in intelligence operations? Where do we draw the line between individual privacy and national security? Is Julian Assange a hero or a villain? And more importantly, what's up with his hair?

The opening sequence of the movie is a history of media, from the invention of the printing press to Twitter, all boiled down into a 5 minute montage of clips. It's kind of like the "I See Dead People" montage at the Oscars.  The story is told through the point of view of one of the WikiLeaks founders, Daniel Berg.  In the film, Julian Assange sees Daniel as more of a trusty  minion than co-creator. even though nobody else seem to care except Daniel.  Daniel is portrayed as the wide-eyed innocent with a heart of gold, while Assange is the crazy visionary with a sketchy background involving cults, hackers, and bottles of L'Oreal Platinum Blonde #37.

Assange is the Willie Wonka to Daniel's Charlie, with Assange introducing Daniel to a world of pure imagination and possible revolution on the internet. The big wide web is symbolically represented by a vast room filled with desks with computers on them, with anonymous users sending in information to WikiLeaks. The filmmaker uses symbols like this to good effect, because watching two guys coding for two hours would be even worse than watching a Cardinals-Red Sox series for a Giants fan.

Boiled down to its essence, the plot is the same as the  Jobs nerdmance: Morally grounded boy meets megalomaniacal visionary; the pair create something big from nothing but a dream; tearful break-up ensues. (See also: The Social Network's Zuck and Eduardo nerdmance gone wrong).

Benedict Cumberbatch played the Cumberbatch role, which is to say, the Steely-Eyed, Socially Awkward, Genius-Liar. Cumberbatch gnaws his way through a whole warehouse full of scenery, with the other actors looking on in awe. Or maybe terror.  I like Cumberbatch and enjoyed watching him on the BBC Sherlock series, as well as the reincarnated Star Trek films. This performance seemed to be a mash-up of his prior performances, though I'm told he does a brilliant Stephen Hawking that is quite different from his other roles.

Overall, I'm glad we saw the movie, since the details of the WikiLeaks saga have always been confusing to me. I'm not sure that it is any more clear to me now or how much of this was fact and how much fiction. Daniel and the hive of newspaper editors come across as principled and thoughtful, whereas Assange's primary motive seems to be to get attention due to a crappy childhood. Like my mom always says, "No matter what, they always blame the mother."

I imagine that the real Julian Assange must be getting bored hanging out in the Peruvian embassy eating ceviche, reading reviews of this movie, and attempting to discredit Daniel Berg.  In the movie, he's always going to or coming from some exotic location or another and stirring the internet pot, so sitting inside an embassy for a year must be pretty tedious for him. I suppose the possibility of going to jail in Sweden or to Gitmo would be worse, so there's not much incentive for him to leave.  If he gets truly bored, there's always the World Series.

Movie Review: What Riddick 3 Teaches Us About Survival (Spoilers!)

I went to see the new Riddick movie this weekend with my husband and son. I'm either the worst mom in the world or the best, depending on who you talk to.  The theatre was filled with teenage boys, their dads, and 20-something guys.

Women were scarce in the theatre and were either dates who thought "Riddick" was short for "Ridiculous" and was a comedy starring Reese Witherspoon, or were older women who were paying penance for forcing their husbands to see the last Reese Witherspoon vehicle.  There may have been a few women who just dig Vin Diesel's "just got outta jail and ready to rob a liquor store" look.  If so, I  sincerely hope there is a support group or a 12-step program for that. 

The new Riddick movie is the third installment of a series starring Vin Diesel as a man from some far-off planet who has been left for dead repeatedly throughout his life. As an infant, all the babies on his planet were killed to forestall some prophecy from being fulfilled.  Clearly, these people skipped Vacation Bible School as children and didn't realize that this plan never, ever works.

If you didn't see the first two installments of the Riddick saga, I'm told that neither of them made much sense, so you are at no real disadvantage.  What you need to know is that Riddick is the ultimate survivalist, a sort of Bear Grylls in Space. If you can stomach the violence and gore, you can learn a great deal from Riddick about surviving in a hostile environment, whether it's a barren planet full of monsters or the local PTA.

Here are the key things I learned about survival from Riddick 3:

1. Don't Get Involved in Local Politics. Riddick's predicament is the outcome of a power struggle with another guy (played by Karl Urban, not Keith Urban, as my husband erroneously informed me). The two are in an argument  over who will be the Lord Marshal* of some small planet. My husband originally told me that they were vying for Grand Marshal. I thought that it was a little silly to get so upset over who gets to ride in the back of a convertible in a parade.  I have heard that the politics behind the Rose Parade can get, well, thorny, so the point is that you can never tell.   Actually, Karl/Keith and Riddick are fighting over who gets to wear a spiky neckbrace and sleep with four naked women at a time, so the stakes are much lower than the Rose Parade. Just ask Vin Scully.

 *Also, don't rely on descriptions of movies from my husband, ever.

2.  Memorize Web MD.  If you fall off a cliff (or are pushed off one) and your leg is broken, you need to know how to set it without anesthetic, using only the screws that fall out of your body armor.  Riddick has been left for dead repeately since infancy, so he instinctively knows what to do and seems immune from infection. He's just too badass for bacteria to colonize on, I suppose.  He also proactively innoculates himself against cobra-scorpion hybrid venom, which comes in handy later when people are trying to shoot him full of horse tranquilizers.  Remember the Riddick motto: Bandages are for wussies!

3. Be Creative. If Bear Grylls has taught us anything about surviving the hours in the wild you're not holed up in a five-star hotel with a camera crew, it is that you need to use everything you find in your environment to your advantage.  Riddick shows us that if you find some giant monster traps lying around, use them! Especially when giant, water-dwelling monsters are just under the next raincloud. If you find a woman's make-up compact, use it!  The mirror can come in handy to look around corners, temporarily blind an enemy, or to freshen up your look.

4. Find a Companion.  If at all possible, find an ally to help you in hostile territory. The planet Riddick is on is chock full of weird monsters that love to eat man-meat. He tames a Dingo-Dongo, an animal that reminded me of an old joke: "What do you get when you cross a hyena with a tiger?" ..."I don't know, but it's standing right next to you." Even the stoic Riddick, whose two facial expressions seem to be "bored" and "teeth-baring grimace," can't go it alone. Riddick realizes that with a little training, Dingo-Dongos make excellent pets, can sniff out danger, and will entertain for hours when they are not trying to eat you.

5. Know Who to Trust. If you send out a distress beacon, be prepared for whoever might show up. They could be friendly, helpful firefighters, or a crew of bounty hunters who are literally out for your head.  The first group to show up looked like they all were released from prison the same day, entered a mud-wrestling tournament, then joined the Intergalactic Merchant Marines on a whim. The first wave came prepared with a high-tech lucite box with its own micro-climate to store Riddick's severed head in when they transported it back to the Grand Marshal's lair. It seemed like a pretty fancy box for such a gruesome task. The first group was quickly followed by a team of aging Abercrombie models with high-tech gear and a token lesbian sharpshooter.  The first bounty hunters wanted to kill Riddick, but the other group wanted to talk to him before they killed him. Luckily, Riddick was able to gain the upper hand on all of them by being stealthy and creative. He was also able to get ahead using knife skills that a Benihana chef would envy.  He was even able to charm the lesbian sharpshooter by complimenting both her pedicure and her breasts in under 10 words. What woman wouldn't fall for that?

Overall, I liked this film more than I expected I would and walked away with some practical knowledge I can use if I'm ever marooned on a deserted island, trapped in a movie theatre full of teen boys, or forced to serve on our Homeowners Association Board. Vin Diesel's limited facial expressions and somber monotone grew on me over the nine hours of the film (actually 2 that just seemed like 9). By the end, I  was rooting for him to run off with the sharpshooter and be welcomed back to his home planet on the back of a convertible spaceship wearing a satin sash.

Oh, and Hollywood, if you're reading this, I have an idea for a Rom-Com screenplay starring Reese Witherspoon and Keith Urban who start off as rivals for the title of Grand Marshal of the Rose Parade who end up falling in love.  Contact my agent, Donna Schwartz Mills, if you're interested in a meeting.

 

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Disney World of Color Road Show: SF, Sacramento, San Diego & LA Play Host to Disney Marvel

Last week, some local mombloggers and I were treated to a very special Disney show in San Francisco.  For a few hours that night, the historic Legion of Honor was transformed from it's normal ornate facade into everything from a Mayan temple to a Chinese Pagoda to a techno-marvel that looked like a giant motherboard.  How? Through some lights, cameras and a little Disney magic.

The World of Color Road Show is traveling to four cities in California (San Francisco, San Diego, Sacramento and Los Angeles) to promote the wonderful World of Color light and water show at Disney California Adventure.  The Road Show doesn't have the fire and water, but it does transform a landmark building into a marvel of light and color.  The show runs 12 minutes, and has a different theme for each city.  San Francisco's theme was "Love".

July 15-18, SACRAMENTO:  The theme is "Nature" with forest and garden scenes from such films as “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs,” “Pocahontas,” “Bambi” and “Alice in Wonderland.”  The show will be presented in historic Old Sacramento, and webcast live from 9 p.m. to 11:30 p.m. each evening.

July 22-25, SAN DIEGO: “Water” is the theme, with scenes from “The Little Mermaid,” “Finding Nemo” and others projected onto the U.S.S. Midway Museum at Navy Pier.

July 31-August 1, LOS ANGELES:  Check out "Sky", featuring scenes from such classic Disney films as "Alladin" and "Fantasia", projected onto the Walt Disney Concert Hall in downtown Los Angeles.

Each show features a live online presentation that is repeated continuously from 9 p.m. to 11:30 p.m.

Check out these fine Bay Area blogs for more information on the World of Color Road Show and the World of Color show at Disney California Adventure:

• Xiaolinmama
• Tippytoes & Tantrums
• Who's the Boss? (excellent tips on how to get a good spot at the Disney California Adventure World of Color show)
• Techmamas
  

Disney's World of Color Premiere: Lights! Cameras!...Water!

I had the great privilege of being invited to Disney's World of Color premiere at Disney's California Adventure in Anaheim, California on Thursday, June 10.  Disney sponsored myself and other family travel and mombloggers to be part of the media contingent who were allowed in for the opening night festivities.  Along with viewing the show, we also got to hang out on the red blue carpet with celebrities, meet Disney executives and Imagineers, and hear about what's next for the Disney Parks, Resorts, and Cruises.  It was a hectic but fun two day adventure, and I was honored to take part in it.

The show itself is a visual and auditory extravaganza, a stunning display of animation, waterworks, fireworks, and lights.  I had seen preview clips of the show, but none of them did justice to what we witnessed.  The show was introduced by none other than the Mouse Himself, and a series of spectacular fireworks.

Go See The Host

We recently went to see The Host (Gwoemul) by Korean director Bong Joon-ho.  If you haven't heard about it, it's a monster movie from South Korea that has gotten fairly wide distribution in the US.  I was delighted and a bit surprised to see a movie in Korean at our local multiplex.  Although the actors in the trailer are speaking English, the movie is mostly in Korean with subtitles.

When I first heard about it, I thought it would be like those awful Godzilla movies that Frank and Alex love to torture me with on Saturday nights. Is it just me, or do other people have children who like to sing "mo-su-ra, mo-su-ra" in an attempt to summon a giant moth to save Tokyo? 

Anyway, the premise of The Host is based on a real-life incident in which a US Army official forced an underling to dump toxic chemicals into a drain leading to the Han River.  In the movie version, the chemicals lead to a mutant creature that grows to epic proportions, and surfaces one sunny day to terrorize people hanging out in the park beside the river.  This leads to a campaign of government "misinformation" to try to downplay the monster's existence and threat.